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How can I Make my Child Emotionally Resilient?

To build strong foundations for your child’s emotional resilience and wellbeing, encourage them, be consistent and let them know they are loved. This will prepare them for the pressure and stresses of life

Girl looking distressed as she takes an examWhile school years are often referred to as the "best years of our lives," they can also be emotionally and mentally demanding. Developing emotional resilience in your child is essential to help them cope with stress and bounce back from negative experiences. By laying a strong emotional foundation, you prepare your child for life's challenges, enabling them to navigate the pressures and stresses they encounter during school and beyond.

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Understanding Emotional Resilience

Emotional resilience, as defined by the charity Young Minds, is the ability to undergo normal development under challenging circumstances. It reflects the human capacity to face, overcome, and emerge stronger from life's adversities and challenges. Building resilience equips children to better navigate life's ups and downs and promotes mental well-being.

Fostering Confidence

While parents may want to shield their children from difficulties, it's crucial for children to learn to cope with challenges independently. Developing self-confidence allows them to confront adversity, recover from setbacks, and continue moving forward. Everyone faces moments of self-doubt, but a child's self-belief, a supportive environment, and the presence of caring individuals can help them overcome negative situations.

Children should be allowed to tackle challenges and work through them. While offering support and guidance, it's essential not to overprotect them. Each challenge they face provides an opportunity to learn strategies for handling difficult situations, which will benefit them in the future.

The charity Mind provides valuable tips for young people on developing emotional resilience.

Avoiding Excessive Pressure

Parents often impose significant expectations on their children to succeed. Orchestrated schedules filled with various extracurricular activities aim to prepare children for success in life. However, these demanding schedules leave little room for children to be themselves and relax. Children may feel inadequate if they don't excel in every area due to these high expectations. Many hobby-related activities, such as sports, music, and dance, tend to be achievement-oriented, and this can create pressure to perform exceptionally in every pursuit. This not only hampers free time but also drains emotional and physical resources.

Dealing with Exam Stress

The pressure to achieve high standards in school and excel in exams can take a toll on a child's emotional well-being. According to a study by the NSPCC, academic concerns are a significant source of stress for almost 50% of children. ChildLine received over 34,000 inquiries related to revision, school workloads, and other school issues in 2013-14. The relentless pursuit of meeting educational targets can place stress on both teachers and students, including your child.

Each child has unique strengths and areas where they may struggle. Assure your child that giving their very best, not necessarily perfection, is what truly matters. This removes the burden of trying to meet unrealistic expectations. If your child is facing difficulties, arrange a meeting with their teacher to explore potential solutions.

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Addressing Peer Pressure

Some children are more susceptible to peer pressure than others and may compromise their values to fit in or gain acceptance. Encourage your child to trust their own judgment. Teach them to listen to their hearts and minds when peers pressure them to conform or engage in negative behaviour. By maintaining their individuality and seeking like-minded friends who share their interests, they can protect themselves from the pressures of conformity.

Building a support network, whether it's friends or family, helps enhance emotional resilience and mental well-being.

School Support for Emotional Problems

If you have concerns about your child's emotional well-being, contact your child's school and arrange a meeting with the pastoral or SEN (Special Educational Needs) teams. Schools may use different names for these support systems, such as learning mentors or year tutors. These teams should address your concerns and provide structured intervention if necessary. Ensure that your child knows where to seek help if needed, and that they have access to understanding staff trained to handle emotional and mental health issues.

Focusing on Strengths

Confident and happy young girl

Every child is unique, with their own strengths and weaknesses. Recognizing and nurturing their strengths boosts their self-esteem, helping them believe in themselves across various areas. A confident, well-rounded child enjoys emotional and mental health. Regularly express encouragement and demonstrate your faith in them, celebrating their positive actions and words. Rather than dwelling on negatives, address challenges together and teach your child how to cope and move on.

Emotional resilience is key to your child's well-being and readiness for life's challenges. To build this resilience, offer encouragement, consistency, and above all, convey your love. A loving, safe, and supportive home environment lays a strong foundation, enabling children to rebound from setbacks and acquire the skills they need to become independent, confident, and well-rounded young adults.

For further advice, explore the Education Quizzes Knowledge Bank. It features numerous articles aimed at addressing specific questions that parents commonly have. This resource offers a wealth of information on education, school-related topics, and raising happy, healthy, and secure children.

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